It's Been Over a Year

It's been over a year since I've posted here, so here I am to update whoever reads these. My ex-girlfriend, and very good friend, Dominique, passed away in October 2023. Although we weren't in a relationship anymore, we were still good friends. Dominique was the first person that accepted my transgender identity, without hesitation. She's the one who took me to my first doctor's appointment to start the process of getting my testosterone. When I was lost, she was there. Even after we broke up, she researched the best insurance for me to get the best deal with my top surgery. I could never write the right words to express the feelings I had for her, and how she cared for others. My heart is broken, and grief is so fucking hard to deal with.

The following April, a bunch of us went to Colorado to celebrate her birthday and spread her ashes in the mountains. Early on in our relationship, we went to Colorado for a vacation to celebrate both of our birthdays. We took an ATV up into the mountains and found a huge rock to climb on. We all took turns taking pictures and mooning the scenic view.

So, when we went back, we found this exact rock to spread her ashes on. We bought tulips, her favorite flower that she had tattooed on her, and spread them onto the rock as well. It was very cathartic and helpful to the grieving process.

Other than that huge event, I got fired a few weeks ago, and have been looking for jobs. I was miserable at that job, but I still need money, and being jobless honestly sucks. My friend in Pensacola has a job for me, I just have to do good at the interview and I'll have a place to stay with my friend. I'm hoping this opportunity works out, but if it doesn't, I'll just have to keep applying to random jobs.

Anyway, I'll have three years sober/clean in September, if I make it. I'm currently going to about six meetings a week and reading a lot. I just kind of feel lost right now.

Thanks for reading, and don't forget to keep going!